[Singing In Arabic]
Aah!
Show them the courage of Allah.
Aah!
He says you stole the bread.
It's a lie.
I caught him stealing ours.
Cut off the infidel's hand.
No. I took the bread.
Wait. That's not true.
They're not interested in the truth.
But he's lying.
You're too weak, Peter. You would not live.
As you wish.
Cut the other one's hand off as well.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Robin.
Oh, God.
No, no, no!
This is English courage.
Aah!
Aah! Aah!
That's for five years of hell.
Behind you!
Come on, Robin, for God's sake.
Come on!
Wait! Take us with you!
You cannot save those people, Christian...
but you can save me.
They're coming, Robin.
Robin, come on.
Christian!
Why should I?
For pity's sake.
My sentence is death.
He's a Moor. Don't listen.
I will show you a way out.
Why should we?
If you do not, we're dead.
No, Robin. For God's sake.
Robin, they're coming!
I'm sorry.
Come, Christian. Come.
This way.
Thanks. I misjudged you.
You are fast with a sword, my friend.
Five years I've waited to smell free air.
It makes a man fast.
Aah!
Peter!
[Guard Shouting In Arabic]
It's mortal.
Leave me.
Give this ring to my sister Marian...
and swear you'll protect her for me.
His wound is by the heart.
We cannot save him.
Swear it, Robin.
I swear it.
They're coming.
Tell Marian I died a free Englishman.
Pe-Peter!
Peter!
For England!
No, no!
Come, my friend.
Make his sacrifice an act of honor.
Come now.
Why did you cut me free, Christian?
Whatever blood is in your veins...
no man deserves to die in there.
Farewell, friend.
God speed your way.
Our way lies together with the speed of Allah.
What?
You have saved my life, Christian.
I will stay with you until I have saved yours.
Thanks, but I go to England.
I relieve you of your obligation.
Only Allah can do that.
What if I say no?
You have no choice.
I am Azeem Edin Bashir Al Bakir.
You may call me Azeem.
[Guards Shouting In Arabic]
Robin of Locksley.
Kindest sir...
'tis rumored you fought in King Richard's crusade...
with my beloved son Robin.
I fear you have returned home...
to desperate times...
when dark forces plot against our absent king.
I am anxious for word of my son.
Were you present at his capture nearJerusalem?
Do you know the name...
of the potentate who holds him?
Does he still bear me ill will?
A little news, please, sir.
I would give all that I own for his release.
[Shouting]
[Grrr]
I will see him, I tell you!
Get out of my way!
Stop there!
Help me, my lord!
You should have waited.
I'm sorry you were disturbed, master.
Duncan, it's all right. Let him go.
They've taken my Gwen, my daughter.
Who's taken her?
Men on horses, in masks.
We tried to stop them, but...
my son, he's dead.
He's dead.
Master, stay.
There is an evil moon tonight.
Never fear, Duncan.
Good will overcome.
Trust in that.
I'm sorry, my lord.
I had no choice.
You!
Locksley.
The king shall hear of this!
Join us.
Never.
Join us...
or die.
God and King Richard!
Yaah!
Oh, thank you, Lord.
I'm home.
I'm home!
You are strange, Christian.
Yes, but I'm free.
Now I beg you to free yourself of your vow.
Return with the boat.
I know how it feels to be so far...
from your home and family.
Because I love them so much...
I cannot dishonor them.
I thought you would say that.
No man controls my destiny...
especially not one who attacks downwind...
and stinks of garlic.
Come, Azeem.
Our fighting days are done.
By nightfall, we'll celebrate with my father.
You understand, of course...
I had to try.
I would have succeeded.
Why must you walk in back of me?
In your country, am I not the infidel?
Ha ha ha.
It seems safer to appear as your slave...
rather than your equal.
For an infidel, you have uncommon clarity of thinking...
but you tell me nothing of yourself.
For instance, your name Azeem...
what does it mean?
Great one.
Great one, really?
Did you give yourself this name?
It's... It's a joke.
Azeem the great one, I am home!
Whoo!
Look.
Mistletoe.
Many a maid's lost her resolve to me...
thanks to this little plant.
In my country, we talk to our women.
We do not drug them with plants.
What do you know of women?
Where I come from, Christian...
there are women of such beauty...
that they can possess a man's mind so...
that he would be willing to die for them.
Wait. Is that why you were to be executed?
Because of a woman?
That's it, isn't it?
That's it!
It is close to sunset.
You painted old dog. Who was she?
The mullah's daughter?
Huh?
Another man's wife?
What's her name?
Is there no sun in this cursed country?
Which way is east?
- Her name. - East!
Her name.
- Jasmina. - That way.
You are sure?
I would know blindfolded. I'm five miles from home.
Was she worth it?
Worth dying for.
[Dogs Barking]
We've got him now!
[Dogs Barking]
Ha ha ha.
You're dog's meat, son, you know that.
Get down here!
You know that you're doomed!
Come down here!
Down!
You're not playing by the rules, boy.
Deer don't climb trees.
Perhaps he thinks he's a game bird.
Ha ha ha!
Shall we teach him to fly?
Yeah.
Get him down.
[Robin] Hold!
I'm curious as to what manner of creature...
is so fearsome that it takes six men to attack it.
Stranger, this is no affair of yours.
Well, have we treed the devil himself?
Let me see.
A small boy... a truly dangerous animal.
This boy killed one of the sheriff of Nottingham's deer.
You starve us!
We needed the meat.
I advise you to move on, pilgrim.
This is the sheriff s land.
Wrong.
This is my land and my tree.
Therefore, whatever is in it also belongs to me.
Might I have the pleasure of your name...
before I have you run through?
Robin of Locksley.
Well, well. Locksley.
Welcome home.
Kill him!
Aah!
Azeem!
It's time to redeem that vow!
Unleash the hounds!
Get off your damn knees!
Look out!
[Boy] Yay!
Now, sir...
if you'd be so kind as to give me your name...
before I run you through.
Guy of Gisborne, the sheriff s cousin.
That little bastard was poaching deer.
Poaching? Is it not a greater crime to starve a family?
Go on, Locksley.
Go on.
I've seen enough blood spilt to last two lifetimes.
Now get off my land.
And tell Nottingham what happens to his scum...
when they pick on small children.
You.
You traveled 10,000 miles to save my life...
then leave me to be butchered?
I fulfill my vows when I choose.
Which does not include prayer times...
or mealtimes or anytime I'm outnumbered 6-to-1.
You whine like a mule.
You are still alive.
Have no fear. Come down, boy.
Is it true, boy? Did you kill a deer?
Hundreds of them.
You scared him.
Interesting place, this...
England.
[Bell Clanging]
[Bird Squawking]
Hold up, Sir Guy.
The sheriff s not to be disturbed.
Cousin.
I trust you justify your intrusion...
with news of profound value.
I met a hooded man today...
who bade me warn you not to harm his people.
Who told you to cover up?
His name?
Robin of Locksley.
The prodigal son returns.
He's a whelp. This girl could best him.
Put it there!
Yes, well, this whelp bested four of my men.
Yes, well, your men were probably drunk.
And yet you survived, cousin.
I barely survived.
Yes, yes. I'm sure it would take an army...
to match these rogues.
I trust Locksley's visited his manor...
and found the home fires still burning.
Time for potence, cousin.
Mortianna?
[Grumbling]
- [Squawks] - Shut up!
You cold, madam?
Chit-chit-chit-chit-choo.
Ya, ya, ya.
What do you see?
The son of a dead man.
Locksley.
Does he affect us?
He precedes the lionheart.
King Richard returns from the Crusades.
That could prove a bit awkward.
It would soften the spines of the barons.
Soon?
Make haste.
But my plan is still intact?
Aah!
What's wrong?
I have seen our death.
The painted man...
he haunts my dreams...
adorned with strange foreign markings.
Ah! Locksley's companion.
Kill him!
Kill them both!
[Moaning]
Father?
Father!
Is anyone here?
Duncan!
Father!
No!
No.
Who is it?
It's my father.
[Footsteps]
Who's there?
Master Robin?
Is that you?
Duncan?
Oh, praise be.
I thought God had abandoned us.
Duncan, my father.
Oh, it's a miracle.
Why... Why didn't you cut him down?
It's a miracle.
I never thought that...
Are you deaf?
Easy!
Look at him.
I would have done if I could see.
Who did this to you, Duncan?
Guy... Guy of Gisborne...
with the sheriff and his witch looking on.
Why?
They say that the sheriff...
captured your father worshiping the devil...
that he signed a confession...
before the bishop.
No.
That's not possible.
Nottingham declared all Locksley lands forfeit.
Did you believe the charges?
Not even when they took my eyes.
[Sobbing]
We must go.
He loved you till the end, young master.
He never gave up hope of your return.
I should have been here.
He called the Crusades a foolish quest.
He said it was vanity to force other men...
to our religion.
But you must flee now.
Head south to safety.
Gisborne will surely seek revenge.
I hear you, Duncan.
You should go home.
My world's turned upside down here.
I cannot ask you to come where I am going.
Alone, Christian, you will only get yourself killed.
Besides...
there is nothing left for me to go home to.
I will not rest until my father is avenged.
I swear it...
by my own blood.
What is this place?
Peter's home.
It's nearly six years since we left together.
We'll find food and shelter here.
[Knock Knock Knock]
No more beggars.
Tell the mistress of the house...
that Robin of Locksley is at her door.
Her ladyship's not here.
Is the child Marian at home?
Maybe she is. Maybe she isn't.
Aah!
Ohh!
The hospitality in this country...
is as warm as the weather.
It's a joke.
Really?
Leave your weapons!
Just you.
Wait here.
Right here?
A curse on Moors and Saracens.
Were it not for their ungodly ways...
Master Robin would never have left.
What manner of name is Azeem...
Irish, Cornish?
Moorish.
[Gasp]
Who are you?
Robin of Locksley.
You lie. Robin is dead.
Step into the light.
Turn around.
Am I to dance next?
Who are you?
I am the maid Marian.
Well, then show yourself, child...
for we knew each other well.
The years have...
been kind.
Thank you.
With the king away...
we must guard against villainous outlaws...
who would kidnap a relative of his.
Surely you can see I'm not one of those.
Perhaps.
Now remove yourself from this house.
I would, my lady, but I'm sworn to protect you.
Protect me?
Robin of Locksley was nothing but a spoiled bully.
And besides...
as you can see...
we have enough protection.
Marian, wait.
You are truly courageous against an unarmed man.
Aah!
Point me toward danger, Azeem. I'm ready.
Stop! Stop!
Aah!
Ohh!
Hello, Marian.
His last thoughts were of you.
Oh, Peter.
Oh, God.
I'm sorry, Marian.
I'm sorry.
How do I know you didn't abandon him...
to save your own skin?
No one feels his loss more than I.
The next time I visit London...
I'll convey your condolences...
to my mother.
I would think, for your safety...
that you would join her there.
No. I have no interest in life at court.
All that gossip mongering...
and currying favor.
But you're alone here.
Hardly.
These years have left us many in need.
While you and my brother were off playing boy heroes...
Nottingham has plundered the shire.
I see you still have your lands.
Because I give them no excuse to take them.
I am the king's cousin.
It is my station to look after these people...
until his return.
Marian.
My purpose in coming was not to hurt you.
I swore...
I swore to your brother that I would protect you.
You cannot replace my brother.
I don't...
I don't want to replace him.
Marian, I've returned to my home to find it destroyed...
and my father murdered.
And the only explanations for it...
are the ramblings of an old blind man.
All I remember of you...
is a spoiled bully who used to burn my hair as a child.
Please allow that years of war and prison...
may change a man.
Robin, whatever happened...
between you and your father...
you mustn't believe...
what they accused him of.
I don't.
Look.
How did your uneducated kind...
ever takeJerusalem?
God knows.
What is it?
It's Nottingham's soldiers.
Coming here? Is this your protection?
I killed some of the sheriff s men.
Oh, dear.
I fear I've placed you in danger.
[Horse Neighs]
I can take care of myself. Just go.
No. That's my horse.
A truly magnificent animal, milady.
Go!
I said I'm sworn to protect you.
And I say no more boyish gestures.
I'm not leaving.
Stop them!
They're stealing my horses!
You're so kind, Marian.
Ooh!
You've been sheltering outlaws, Lady Marian?
They're thieves, you imbecile.
Lucky he didn't steal your virtue as well.
A crown to the man who brings me Locksley's head!
Milady. Hyah!
Have we lost them?
No.
My horse carries two.
Yours is lame. We cannot outrun them.
Leave me, Master Robin.
I slow your escape.
We can lose them in the forest.
Sherwood Forest is haunted, master.
Either we take our chances with the ghosts...
or become ghosts ourselves.
Come on, damn you! There are only three of them!
It's not the men we fear. It's the evil spirits.
Robin of the Hood...
son of a devil worshiper!
Your father died a coward...
cursing your name...
and squealing like a stuck pig!
You will bring no justice to your father...
by dying today.
[Strange Noises]
Master Robin?
There are your ghosts, Duncan...
wind chimes.
A child's toy put to good use.
You scare easily, my painted Moor.
This forest has eyes.
I swear it.
In my dreams alone...
have I imagined such a place.
Then imagine a way to cross it.
There's hope!
There was a rich man from Nottingham
Who tried to cross the river
What a dope, he tripped on a rope
Now look at him shiver
Beg for mercy, rich man!
I beg of no man.
[Shouting]
Aah!
Well, this here is our river...
and any man who wishes to cross...
must pay a tax.
I will pay no tax.
As you can see...
I have nothing...
not even my sword.
Bollocks!
Any man who travels with two servants...
and claims he's got no bloody money...
is either a fool...
or a liar.
Yeah, he's a liar!
Who are you?
John Little...
best man of the woods.
- Yeah! - Yay!
Well, best man, do you lead this rabble?
- Whoa! - Oh!
Yes, I do, mate.
And if you tosspots want to travel through Sherwood Forest...
it's going to cost you...
that gold medallion.
This is sacred to me.
It's sacred to us, too, matey.
That there will feed us for a blooming month.
You'll have to fight me for it.
Whoa! Whoa!
Love to, mate.
- Yeah! - Yeah!
Be careful, Father.
He walloped 12 of the sheriff s men.
Is that so?
Reckon I'm going to enjoy this.
Hey!
That's your father?
Come on, John!
Knock him over, John!
Ha ha ha ha!
Whoa!
[Will Scarlett] He's drowning!
Lost something?
Thanks for the taxes. Ha ha ha!
Looks like the little rich boy...
is lost for words, eh?
Any great ideas?
Get up!
Move faster!
Move faster.
Great idea.
Watch it, John!
We're not through yet.
All right, my old cocker.
You want another good walloping?
You shall have one.
Ohh!
Seems I've made it past the gate, John Little.
Or should I call you LittleJohn?
[Wulf] Hit him, Father! Wallop him!
Swimming time again, old chum.
Ohh!
[Wulf] Where is he?
Do you see him?
It's a bloomin' shame.
He was a brave lad.
Ooh! Aah!
Help!
Do you yield?
I can't bloody swim!
Do you yield?
Yes!
Good. Now put your feet down.
I'll be buggered.
- The medallion. - Give me your name first.
Robin of Locksley.
Well, Robin of Locksley...
you got balls of solid rock.
Come on.
[Laughing]
That's Much, the Miller's son...
Harold Brownwell...
and that stumpy one there is David of Doncaster...
but the lads all calls him Bull.
[Laughing]
'Cause you're short?
No. It's 'cause I'm so long!
Yeah, look.
No, Bull. Save it. Save it for the ladies.
Give the man some mead.
Very good, isn't it?
Now, I made that myself.
Has English hospitality changed so much in six years...
that a friend of mine's not welcome at this table?
But he's a savage, sire.
That he is.
But no more than you or I.
And don't call me sire.
With regret, I must decline.
Allah forbids it.
Your bloody loss, mate.
How is it there are so many of you in hiding?
Well, we're all outlaws.
Got prices on our heads.
Even the young lad there.
He's a blasted sheriff.
He says we owes him taxes.
Well, you know, your ghost...
will only keep the sheriff s men at bay so long.
They've worked so far.
You have a better idea?
You can always fight back.
Yeah. Ha ha ha ha.
I reckon I must have cracked that noble head of yours.
These are all good lads here.
They got hearts of oak, but they're farmers.
It'd be lambs to the slaughter.
They say the sheriff was raised by a witch.
Witch?
She knows every man's thoughts.
You can see right through her...
and she flies.
That's a load of codswallop.
What does the rich son of a devil worshiper care...
about outlaw peasants?
My lord was a kind and generous man!
Who among you dares believe him capable...
Duncan. My father was no devil worshiper...
and I'll have words with any man who says otherwise.
But he's right.
I was a rich man's son.
But when I killed the sheriff s men...
I became an outlaw like you.
You are nothing like us.
Well... that there's Will Scarlett.
Don't take no note of him.
He's full of piss and wind.
Come on, lads, drink up.
Stop talking so much bloody rubbish.
This here is the best we simple men can expect.
Here we're safe.
Here...
we are kings.
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!
[Rooster Crows]
[Coughing]
[Sheep Bleats]
[Coughing]
Aah!
Too much mead, old friend?
Oh, forgive me. I oversleep.
No, no. Rest yourself.
What day is it, Duncan?
Sunday, I think.
Do they still give alms to the poor at mass?
That they do.
These days, the need for mercy...
is greater than ever.
Well, my other god calls.
Oh, don't upset yourself, Mortianna.
Appearances are important to that lot.
Especially on a Sunday.
You know my true faith lies in the old ways.
Although...
frankly sometimes...
I can't see much difference.
Did my parents truly tell you...
to instruct me in all this?
Their dying wish.
[Chuckles]
Come on.
We beseech thy blessing, Lord...
on all your people...
but most especially...
on our noble sheriff of Nottingham.
Grant him the wisdom...
to guide and protect our glorious city.
Grant him also the strength...
to bring to justice...
the lawless men who would threaten its safety...
and prosperity...
and the judgment to punish them...
in your name.
Amen.
- Amen. - Amen.
Go in peace.
Alms, please, sir.
Please, madam.
- Sarah. - Yes.
Thank you.
Ma'am.
That's all I have.
God bless you, mum.
Alms for a blind man, milady?
Mmm.
For one who cannot see your beauty.
Hello.
What are you doing here?
Searching my soul.
I do not wish to be seen with an outlaw.
You prefer the company of Nottingham?
There's a price on your head.
How much?
100 gold pieces.
Is that all?
I'll have to annoy the good sheriff more.
Soon it will be 1,000.
For 1,000, I would turn you in myself.
Nottingham is mounting an army.
He has every blacksmith in the county...
in the castle, making swords and armor.
What is he planning?
I don't know, but there's no limit...
to the man's ambitions.
Go!
Thank you.
Quickly! Go!
Robin, do something for me.
What?
Take a bath.
Take a bath?
These are my private chambers, my son.
I have priests who would hear your confession.
- Gggt! - Aah!
Shh!
I see the boy I knew in the man before me.
Welcome home, Robin.
You shine like the sun, milady.
You've been meeting with Robin of Locksley.
My cousin tells me...
the knave deprived you of some horses.
Oh... yes.
A most disagreeable experience.
Yes, I know. And for inflicting that upon you...
I'm going to hang him from the walls by his own entrails.
I'd like to see that.
If you'd bring your household...
within the city walls...
I could give your every need my personal attention.
I do thank you, but I prefer to stay...
in my family's home for now.
Oh. Well, then, perhaps you'd do me the honor...
of accepting a small token...
of my undying devotion to your safety.
Oh!
Why... King Richard will be deeply moved...
to hear of your concern for my welfare.
Yes, um...
I'm afraid the king has many enemies...
both abroad and at home.
I fear for his safe return.
Oh, no. Fear not, dear sheriff.
He will return, and when he does...
he will wish to reward his faithful subjects.
I asked your father three times...
if he worshiped the dark one...
because his answer vexed me so grievously.
He said...
he must meet God with a clear conscience.
You lie.
On your souls...
do not shed blood in the house of God!
Aah!
[Nottingham] You bastard!
In there!
Get him!
Locksley!
I'm going to cut your heart out...
with a spoon!
Then it begins.
Aah!
He's taking the sheriff s horse!
Close the gate!
The sheriff s horse! Close the gate!
He's stolen the sheriff s horse!
Uhh!
What are you looking at?
There's a rider coming in!
Water!
Thank you.
For the animal.
How can I protect you, Christian...
if I know not where you go?
You've hardly raised a finger...
when you do know...
great one.
I prefer to have the choice.
Wonderful. You've stolen the sheriff s horse?
You've stirred up a bloody hornet's nest now!
Are you afraid, John?
Yeah, a little.
Well, so is the sheriff.
Today I gave him a sting he'll not forget.
You fool! You've started a war!
We're already at war.
Duncan...
bread.
And I say we strike back...
at the very man who takes our homes...
and would hunt our children.
We?
You planning to join us then, matey?
No, to lead you.
Christian...
these are simple people.
They are not warriors.
Be careful you do not do this...
for your own purposes.
You forget yourself, Azeem.
I do not ask for your company or counsel.
Why a spoon, cousin?
Why not an ax or something...
Because it's dull, you twit!
It'll hurt more!
I want this brigand found.
Starve them out!
Slaughter their...
No, take their livestock.
I want Locksley's own people fighting to bring his head in.
Well, perhaps we could create a name for him...
something to drive fear into the hearts of the populace.
Maybe Locksley the Lethal or Wreaking Robin or...
Whatever!
I want him dead by the next full moon...
before the barons come back.
Now sew...
and keep the stitches small!
He's not here, sir.
Where is your mate, the man they call Little?
He died last winter.
Burn it down.
Light the other one.
Leave us the sow. Her young will feed us.
Beware of the Sherwood bandit.
Robin of the Hood? Yes, sir.
Pray he's brought to us before winter.
Ma!
Over here!
Oh, John!
Papa!
They burned it, all of it.
Where is this Robin Hood now?
He's there.
Look! Look what they've done!
If it's fame you seek, Christian...
I think you have it.
You brought this misery on us, Locksley.
It's Nottingham trying to divide us.
We are divided, rich boy.
I'm not as blind as that old man.
You're still trying to be lord of the manor.
I heard today the sheriff now values your neck...
at 500 gold pieces.
I say we take him in.
- Aye. - Aye.
Do you think the sheriff will return everything...
after I'm gone?
He'll give us the reward and our pardons.
Wrong.
He'll stretch your necks one by one.
What would you have us do...
fight armored men on horseback...
with rocks and our bare hands?
If needs be.
But with the one true weapon...
that escapes you, Will...
courage.
Look out!
Thank you, Wulf.
You wish to end this?
You wish to go home?
Then we must stop fighting amongst ourselves...
and face that the price for it may be dear.
I for one would rather die...
than to spend my life in hiding.
The sheriff calls us outlaws...
but I say we are free.
And one free man defending his home...
is more powerful than 10 hired soldiers.
The Crusades taught me that.
I will make you no promises save one...
that if you truly believe in your hearts...
that you are free...
then I say we can win.
They got armor.
Yeah! Right!
They got armor, Bull?
Even this boy can be taught...
to find chinks in every suit of armor.
We ain't got nothing to eat.
What do we need that the forest cannot provide?
We have food, wood for weapons.
We'll find safety and solace in her trees.
Yeah, but what about our kin?
Sheriff s taken all they got, too.
Then, by God, we take it back.
Ho!
Hyah!
What's the meaning of this?
Milady, a woman of your beauty...
has no need for such decorations.
How dare you!
[Bell Rings]
Please don't take that.
Please, sir, those belong to our lord.
Now they belong to my lord sheriff!
- Yay! - Ha ha!
Give it back.
Good. Tell the sheriff...
for every harm he does these people...
I will visit it back on him tenfold.
Something vexes thee?
What the devil?
'Tis a hot day, my friend...
to burden your horse with a heavy purse.
The sheriff will hear of this.
I truly hope so.
Yeah!
There, luv.
Buy yourself a new sow.
God bless you, Fanny...
and God bless Robin Hood.
We reckon he's nicked three to four million...
in the last five months, sire.
All right, fine. Raise the bounty on his head.
25,000 crowns.
Begging your pardon, sire.
It won't do no good how much you raise it.
Really, scribe? And why is that?
Because, sire, the poor, you see?
He gives them what he takes...
and, well, sire, they love him.
Just a minute.
Robin Hood steals money from my pocket...
forcing me to hurt the public...
and they love him for it?
Yes.
That's it, then!
Cancel the kitchen scraps for lepers and orphans...
no more merciful beheadings...
and call off Christmas.
The treasury is empty.
All day and all night, people plague my door...
whining for tax relief...
and safe passage through Sherwood Forest.
"We cannot pay thee...
what the highwayman has taken."
It's the shortest route to London.
It's the only road to London, you little ferret.
Sir Guy's patrols have found nothing, sire.
No camp. Nothing.
[Spits]
This hooded viper simply slithers into the forest.
You, my room, 10:30 tonight.
You, 10:45...
and bring a friend.
A tongue offends thee.
Whose?
One who rights all.
One who...
That horrible little scribe?
- His tongue? - Cut it out.
What's the pleasure in this life
Laughter, love, and drinking
Good King Richard, bless his soul
Loves his wine and warring
But for us who stay at home
There's only beer and whoring
Play your music, dance the day
Think of not tomorrow...
How many?
20.
20?
How many?
Five.
They can't count anyway.
- Come on. - Why scare them?
And they call me barbarian.
Loves his wine and warring
But for us who stay at home
There's only beer and whoring
Play the music, dance the day...
Friar! You'll find it difficult to sing...
with a sword in your gullet.
Yes, my lord.
You pig.
Shut up about it!
Help me move this log!
Log? This is a tree!
You're supposed to help me!
I'm supposed to be meeting a girl!
You men in front, after me.
You men in the rear, stay with the wagon!
On to glory!
Ha ha ha ha ha!
Bastards! Come on, find them!
Oh...
[Burp]
Go!
Hyah!
Welcome to Sherwood, Friar. Giddyup!
Aagh!
- Hey, hey, hey! - Surrender your weapons!
Surrender your weapons and I'll give you my word...
you shall go free!
Don't do that!
Aah! What are you...
Azeem! Aah!
Look at that! Oh!
I'll be buggered.
This treasure had a purpose.
We must find out what.
Oh! Aah!
Good morning, my reverend friend.
You travel with poor company...
when you travel with Nottingham soldiers.
Tax him!
- Tax him! - Tax him!
I'm Robin of Locksley...
and my men are thirsty.
- Aye! - That's right.
Robin Hood!
Ha! Lord bless me.
I mistook you for common thieves.
Kindly let me pass, huh?
Surely the lord has the charity...
to spare a few barrels...
for good Christian men, yes?
We have much to celebrate.
Come on.
If you wish them to share in the good lord's brew...
you must best me for it!
Hyah!
Confess, Robin Hood...
that Friar Tuck is a braver, holier, and wiser man...
than thou art.
He giveth and he taketh away.
Do you yield?
I'd rather roast in hell.
Aah!
Shoot him! Shoot him!
Robin has his way
Whether you live by night or day
Whether you're rich or young or old
Whether you're noble, meek, or bold
You will fall
Short or tall
Oh, I think the good friar's taken us far enough.
Well done, Friar.
Thank you, Lord, for teaching me humility.
Ohh.
Well, Tuck...
Thanks for the beer.
Are these not the meek of the earth?
We're in need of an honest man to minister to them.
What say you, Friar?
The Lord reveals himself in mysterious ways.
I accept.
Good.
You will not regret it.
Aye, but you may!